Lots of people think that you shouldn’t approach women in situations where they might want to be left alone. Apparently, if you approach girls when they’re wearing headphones, reading, working out, or walking down the street, you’ll just annoy them.
Well, I’m here to tell you that that’s bullshit.
Let clarify my position for a second. Obviously, it’s true that women sometimes want to be left alone. And when women give a clear indication they don’t want to talk to us, we should respect it.
But the fact is, that girl who looks ‘busy’ might just be the perfect one for you. And why should you sacrifice your pursuit of happiness and love just because you might annoy a stranger for a second?
Why you should approach in ‘risky’ situations
1. Some women want to be approached
When you start taking some risks, you realise that your worst fears are often unfounded. Girls are frequently happy to meet you.
Sometimes that girl studying is bored. Sometimes that girl wearing headphones is lonely. Sometimes that girl strolling down the street is waiting for a cool guy to walk into her life.
2. There are no risk-free situations
Now we’ve established that some women want to be approached, here’s something to bear in mind. Outside of a singles night, there are no situations where a woman will definitely not mind being approached. There is always a risk you will annoy her.
Even in social places like bars and clubs, a certain percentage of women want to be left alone. They are catching up with a long-lost friend, they just want to dance, they just got dumped and temporarily hate men, etc.
In fact, I’ve had some women be absolutely obnoxious to me in bars and clubs just for walking over to them. Weirdly, that has never happened to me in the day.
3. Most guys can’t afford to wait for approach invitations
Of course, women will sometimes give guys approach invitations by looking at them. But I’ve had some amazing interactions with girls who didn’t look at me.
There is just no sure way of knowing what will happen until you approach. So unless you’re a male model and you’re constantly getting stared at, you need to approach everyone you’re attracted to.
4. Less people are approaching the ‘busy-looking’ girls
Every guy looking at the cute girl with headphones on is thinking the same thing: “what if I annoy her?” And if you’re the only guy to approach her that day, that works in your favour.
5. So what if you annoy her?
That girl doesn’t care if you’re lonely, so why should you care if she’s busy? I don’t like being stopped by charity fundraisers but I know they’re not trying to annoy me, and I accept it as a part of life. So should the girls you approach.
The Single Greatest Reason you should approach boldly
Simply put: the bigger the risk, the bigger the reward.
Approaching a girl in a bar is relatively low-risk, but you don’t win any points for boldness.
When you approach in the street, there’s a definitey chance you’ll be rejected. But it also speaks volumes about your confidence and your ability to take risks, which is very attractive. When she does accept your bold approach, the payoff is huge and you instantly stand out from all the other guys.
A Word of Warning to guys
I have to add a couple of caveats here for any guys reading this.
1. No woman owes you a conversation
When you take risks, girls are going to reject you. Don’t take it personally and don’t argue with them. You are doing something unusual and they have every right to walk away or ignore you.
2. Be aware of female safety concerns
As guys, we often forget that women worry about getting raped – or they actually have been in the past. So being bold doesn’t mean being thoughtless. Think twice about approaching her on that quiet train platform at night, because you might just scare the shit out of her.
In short, taking risks is part of meeting women, and accidentally ruffling a few feathers is inevitable.
The only way to guarantee you will NEVER annoy a woman is to NEVER take action.
And we all know where that ends..